We're not sure how much longer we'll have Keach Hagey's Press Clips to kick around, but there it is in the front of this week's Voice, nestled amidst the comforting, hairy bosoms of Michael Musto and Nat Hentoff, and a mere eleven pages away from that Ultragrrrl-burned-at-the-stake cover. As is the custom around these parts, let's take a close look. Has she settled in? Will we stay awake through the whole thing?

This week, Keach checks in with Mark Green, New York's most boring politician. Green (with a little help from his moneybags brother) recently bought Air America, which provides New York's most boring radio. For one thing, this deal was approved in mid-February; the deal went through on March 6th.

So the fact that you're tardily reading about this in New York's most boring newspaper is either an incredibly meta commentary or a sign that maybe this column isn't quite ready for front-of-the-book acreage.

Anyway, what's the column about? Who the fuck cares? The implicit agreement we all made when we decided not to vote for Mark Green for attorney general was that we would never have to hear from him again. Why would we want to break that covenant? Keach, didn't you get the memo? The folks out in Phoenix aren't playing to the hippie crowd anymore. Next week, tell us about Vice. Why is Gavin McInnes such a douchebag, that sort of thing. You know, if you're around.

We know this is harsh. We want to feel the love. But we can't love you if you won't allow us.
RATING: No more fucking Mark Green. Ever.

Air America's Green Revolution [VV]
Earlier: Tomorrow's 'Village Voice' May, May Not, Surprise
Grading Keach Hagey: Her First Column!