Alright, we fess up. Gawker Weekend exists for one reason: we want to own the coverage of PARADE magazine, the nation's favorite Sunday insert and, with the Guinness-confirmed genius lady Marilyn vos Savant on board, literally the smartest publication on Earth. Among the reader-submitted questions to be answered this weekend: How can I dine like the stars at those lavish Oscar-night dinner parties?"; "Who do you think had more of an impact on music: Elvis Presley or James Brown?"; and "What are 'Sea-Monkeys'?" There's also, inexplicably, a long profile of Dharma & Greg's Thomas Gibson (what's he up to? Not much!) and "exclusive pictures" of Christina Ricci.

But what makes PARADE truly badass is its total For-Us-By-Us dedication to the whims of the silent majority. To wit, the current most popular feature on the PARADE website is a poll called "Who do you think is the world's worst dictator?" Surely, there must be a better way to decide this. As it stands, feel the wrath of democracy, Robert Mugabe! You've only got 1% of the PARADE reader vote.