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We know we're hitting the Post pretty hard today, but seriously: those people should stop trying to pretend that they read books. An item in today's Page Six informs us that Upper East Side socialites are "shaking in their Manolos" in fear of a book proposal that Molly "Erica's daughter" Jong Fast is shopping. The new book to be is apparently entitled The Social Climber's Handbook, and according to the Sixers, "it is expected to do as well as Molly's first two books."

Really? That well? According to Nielsen Bookscan (which doesn't track all sales outlets, but still gives a good ballpark estimate of a book's sales), Molly's latest, The Sex Doctors In The Basement, sold a whopping 845 copies in hardcover. That, even with blurbs from Kitty Kelley and Moon Unit Zappa. For its paperback publication, it was retitled Girl [Maladjusted], but even that last-ditch effort didn't help: Bookscan has it at 323 copies, which is pretty much one copy for every fawning profile of the Jong-Fast clan that's ever been written. Maybe this time Molly should consider changing her name — the whole nepotism thing doesn't really seem to be working to her advantage, does it?

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