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PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our readers, and are now posted several times a week—so send them in often. Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line) and contribute to what could possibly turn into a perfect Terms of Endearment star-spotting trifecta:

In today's spectacular episode: Jessica, Ashlee and Joe Simpson, Taylor Hicks, John Mayer and Rex Linn; Jack Nicholson; Hilary Swank and John Campisi; Kirsten Dunst and Shirley MacLaine; Mark Foley; Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen, Brett Ratner, Guinevere Van Seenus, Kirsty Hume, Adam Levine and Marcellas Reynolds; Mark Wahlberg; Halle Berry; Maria Shriver and Jamie Lee Curtis; Larry David; Bridget Marquardt; Debra Winger and Arliss Howard; Michael Pena; Tyler James Williams; Dennis Rodman; Sissy Spacek; Forest Whitaker; Queen Latifah; Bob Barker; Dominic Purcell; Jason Bateman; Sean Hayes and Liza Weil; Scott Baio; Nicky Hilton and David Katzenberg; Jay Leno; Chris Parnell and Tom Greene; Harry Hamlin and Lisa Rinna; Jesse Metcalfe; Gary Busey; Adrian Pasdar and Ian Ziering; Dwight Yoakam; Robert Sean Leonard; Warren Christopher; Jane Lynch; Bruce Vilanch; Simon Helberg and Jason Ritter and Patrick Stump.

· It was a celebrity bonanza at the LAX Admirals Club today (Wednesday before Thanksgiving) as the stars scattered to other parts of the country to spread their People magazine worthy holiday cheer.

First off saw Rex Linn (CSI Miami) hanging out with Taylor Hicks talking about Texas football. Then John Mayer wandered by casually scouting out the Admirals Club Dressed in a hooded sweatshirt, very casual, and precisely what you'd expect him to be wearing. Didn't see where he went, but when I went in search of him I discovered not just Jessica Simpson, but Ashlee Simpson as well. Thought the Simpson sisters looked far better in person than I ever expected them to, and Ashley's beauty has certainly surpassed Jessica's (except in the boobs department) thanks to whatever work she had done on her face. Note: did not see Mayer & Simpson together.

· The Simpson clan was seated in the last row of first class on my flight from LAX to Austin on the day before Thanksgiving. Jessica was wearing a cape/shawl type coat and her hair really needed a hot oil treatment. Ashlee looked as plastic as you would expect, and all the surgery was not offset by the Vans/fedora/wide leg pants ensemble she was sporting. Joe had a big fat diamond stud in his ear like he was Nelly or something and got up about five times during the flight to check something in the overheard bin. Mom (Tina I think?) looked normal, but irritated. Bitchiness aside, Jessica was very nice to the one young girl who approached her for an autograph at baggage claim.

· Was at the Coliseum on Saturday night for SC and ND and who should be seated four rows in front of me? (Sec. 6 row 26) Jack Nicholson and his Michael Hutchence-haired kid that's who. Didn't leave his seat once during the entire game; in fact fans were passing in front of him on the way to the toilets on more than a few occasions, oblivious as to who the dude in the white Yankees cap was. Tis' a sight I seldom saw back in college at Ohio State. Can't wait for Jack's Trojans to tangle with my Buckeyes. GO BUCKS!

· Saturday night while I'm cursing having to work instead of getting drunk and watching the Trojans play, Hilary Swank and male friend (the agent she's allegedly dating?—John Campisi) walked into my store on Main Street in Santa Monica. Dressed very casual, both wearing baseball hats, khakis (her), and sweats (him). They looked around for a bit and then wandered out... not very exciting at all but it brought a sliver of interest into my otherwise decrepit evening.

· Last Saturday, at the afternoon showing of Bobby at the Arclight:

Kirsten Dunst and two other girls, all wearing the tight jeans/flats ensemble. Her hair was short and she looked okay. When the Arclight guy came out to introduce the movie, he was listing the extensive cast and when he said Lindsay Lohan one of Dunst's friends said "yeah!" (very sarcastic) and they all started to
giggle. They ducked out right as the credits started.

On the way out, we found out that Shirley MacLaine was apparently in the same showing! They had the clothes from Bobby on display in the lobby and Shirley stopped to look at them, which was adorable because she's been in like ten thousand movies but she was still down to check out some show biz paraphernalia. She was with two men and looked great, totally gorgeous in real casual jeans and a sweater.

· Dull, but true: Chief Protagonist of the midterm's "Cocktober Surprise" and disgraced former Congressman Mark Foley having Sunday brunch with a woman (no preteens in sight) at Doughboys on 3rd.

· While having dinner at Chateau Marmont; Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen at a table of 7 eating. There was a chunky guy that I think was Brett Ratner. Models Guinevere Van Seenus and Kirsty Hume joined them later. Marcellas Reynolds and Adam Levine from Maroon 5 were both wearing scarves. It was cold out, even with the heaters. They were at a huge table drinking and talking. It was very cool.

· 11/19 Marky Mark Wahlberg in a silver Mercedes on Crescent and SM Blvd. I stared at him to confirm identity so I didn't get a good look at his female passenger. He just sort of looked back at me (on my bike), as if to say, yes, it's me. Then he zoomed off.

· 11/21 Was in the very crowded Bristol Farms in BH this afternoon when I spotted Halle Berry in a check-out line, looking really cute in jeans, baseball cap and ponytail, was friendly to everyone around her. Little-to-no-makeup and even prettier in person. At first I wasn't sure it was her so I asked my friend with me what he thought. He craned his neck as discreetly as possible, seeing her from a side view at the check out and replied, "Yep, it's her, I know that a** anywhere". Having been one of the few dozen people that saw CatWoman I don't doubt his expertise.

· Banner day at Barney's on Tuesday! Okay, literally stopped into Barney's for like 10 minutes after lunch to see if they had these Marc Jacob boots in stock that I wanted (they didn't) and discovered it was take-your-daughter-shopping-day. In the "junior" shoe department on the 3rd floor? California First Lady MARIA SHRIVER and one of her daughters (or do she and Govenator only have only one daughter? I know they have multiple off-spring, just not sure of the genders). Maria was looking good, very slim. The daughter is TALL. Then on the way out, saw JAMIE LEE CURTIS and daughter in the jewelry department! Jamie Lee looks hot. Manly, but hot. Funny thing too because my friend and I were, by chance, talking about "For Your Consideration" as we walked by Jamie Lee — as we all know, her husband Christopher Guest directed it! Wonder if she heard us? (We were actually talking about how much it sucked. Which is especially sad since "Waiting for Guffman" is pure genius. Sorry if that's a spoiler for anyone reading this!).

· Last Sunday I was people watching outside the AMC on the Promenade waiting for a friend. A pair of beautifully shaped breasts somehow caught my attention and when I looked up I realized it was Hugh Hefner Girlfriend # 3: Bridget Marquardt. She was wearing the standard, huge, paparazzi-blocking sunglasses, but after a minute I was sure it was her and was thrown back by how much hotter she is in person.

-A little late, but two Saturdays ago I was walking around Fred Segal when I heard a familiar voice, I turned around and realized it was Larry David, wearing the standard sneakers, khakis, and baseball cap that he dons as a "costume" on his show. He was browsing around and making jokes with his wife and from their body language I could have sworn that I was watching an episode of Curb.

· veritable cornucopia of celeb sightings this past holiday weekend....

wed 11/22 at the apple pan on pico... amid the throngs of last-minute pie shoppers hoping for a pecan or pumpkin for the holiday was a placid debra winger, enjoying a burger with much-less-famous husband (boyfriend?) arliss howard and a youngster who was probably her/their kid. just acting like regular folks, aside from the digital snapshots debra was taking of her son chowing down...

wed 11/22 at prizzi's on franklin, none other than michael pena (thanks, imdb!), locksmith from "crash," nic cage buddy in "world trade center" and army to "shield" watchers. he was casually dressed, but talking shop. something about millions for screenplays sold to bruckheimer...

sun 11/26 young tyler james williams, chris from "everybody hates chris," checking out the morning show of "casino royale" at the grove with what looked like siblings and father. sadly, dad appeared to be nowhere near as funny as tv counterpart terry crews. also, a lack of chris rock narration of the unfolding events made the movie trip seem somehow drab.

· I was at The Abbey about 10 pm Thanksgiving night. Dennis Rodman was there with some female arm candy. He was clearly inebriated (or something), but was also in control, *very* friendly and nice, chatting with patrons and behaving in general the way celebrities used to. It was refreshing to see a celebrity who didn't turn into a racist/antisemitic/homophobic monster after a few appletinis. There is hope after all.

· - Friday Nov.17 - Saw Sissy Spacek and a young woman I can only assume was her daughter (red hair, same nose) browsing the sweaters in the JCrew store on the 3rd Street Promonade (friend's comment: "She looks just like my mom" — she did; she looked just like a mom). The next day saw Evan Handler at the Whole Foods on 3rd and Fairfax — looks just like you'd think but thinner; man has no ass.

· My sister and I just got back from Macy's in Sherman Oaks and saw Forest Whitaker shopping with a gorgeous woman and beautiful child, maybe her, (their) pre-teen daughter? Anyway, we were compelled to go up to him and tell him how amazing he was in The Last King of Scotland. He responded with genuine thanks, almost seemed embarrassed by the compliments...all three smiled and thanked us for our comments and we walked away hoping he wins the Oscar! What a nice guy.

· Tuesday night, 8pm: Queen Latifah walks into the Whole Foods in Beverly Hills, engaged in a heated conversation on her cell phone. Though she picks up a hand-basket for food, it remains unfilled for at least twenty minutes as she walks from aisle to aisle trying hard to keep her voice down. She has a wonderful strut.

· Bob Barker at Mayfair Market on Franklin. Wearing a black track suit and Wayfarers inside. Not with a Barker's Beauty, but being dragged around by (younger than him, older than me) blonde.

· 11/21) saw dominic purcell (lincoln burrows) of prison break outside an elementary school in woodland hills...picking up one of his four kids, obviously.

what was i doing there? passing by on my way to mom's to help prep for turkey day. clad in a leather jacket, jeans and boots, and sporting the shaved head and permanent scowl, he looked as just as badass as he does on the show.

· Friday 24 November: Jason Bateman at the 5:30 showing of "For Your Consideration", looking both taller and older than I thought he would.

· Must be Supporting Comedic Foil Week: Sunday, 11/19, saw Liza Weil from Gilmore Girls (also star of the awesome indie Whatever) dining with a friend at the pizza bar. Mozza is overrated but Liza Weil is not. She's tiny and very blonde and pretty, but she looks tiny and blonde and pretty on GG, so this was not surprising. Monday, 11/20, Sean Hayes dining with a male companion at BLD on Beverly Blvd. We were with a bunch of parents in from out of town, so this was a particularly good spot because they all knew who he was (except for my mom, who "does not watch TV," more proof that I might be adopted).

· last night...7:45 showing of Casino Royale at the Pacific Theater in Sherman Oaks Galleria. Scott Baio walks in with a "regular" looking guy friend and they go sit in the back. I didn't hang around after to see where they went, because honestly, who gives a fuck? probably the lamest "sighting" ever. i'll try and have at least a B-celeb in my next report.

· Nicky Hilton and David Katzenberg at Teddy's on Saturday night. All the reports are saying that they're dating, but although they were in the same group, they didn't really seem to be paying attention to each other. Plus, he hit on a girl there and it looked like they exchanged numbers. So either they're not together, or he's just a cheating ass....

· This is a month old now, but pretty odd, I think (but I don't live in LA, so who knows).

Saw Jay Leno trying to enter traffic in residential Burbank (near the Woodbury campus). I didn't notice him at first, because his vehicle was the attraction. It was an ancient, buggy-type car (think is was a car, anyway) that looked as though it should have been pulled by horses. It would not have attracted attention in a parade, but sure did in Burbank. Part of his car collection, perhaps?

· Sat. Nov 18th -

There were a couple of out-of-work comedians at Saturday's Tenacious D concert at the Gibson Amphitheater (which will always be called The Universal in my heart.) Former SNL-er Chris Parnell was walking around the pit with two women. He was happily posing for pictures with fans, which was awesome until I realized that a year ago, he was being paid to NOT spend Saturday nights in L.A. Then I just felt bad for him, because he seemed nice. Then during the (intentionally awful) 2nd opening act (Neil Hamburger, a sad knock-off of Kaufman's Tony Clifton), former MTV star-turned internet obscurity Tom Greene and his entourage failing to get access to the pit. I imagine that will just turn into a segment on his internet talk show. Please note: I hate myself for knowing he has an internet talk show.

I spent Sunday afternoon at The Commons in Calabasas, and mid-sentence of a story I lose my train of thought as I see Harry Hamlin and Lisa Rinna walk right by us— well more specifically, the leathery skin and unbelievable gigantic lips (bigger in person) of Lisa Rinna and the bad spray-on tan of Harry Hamlin.

· Gabrielle Union sitting windowside in a booth with friends at Mexicali Wednesday night.

· 7:30 p.m.-ish Tuesday, 11/21 Saw Jesse Metcalfe (couldn't help but notice the eyebrows first) perusing the wines at Cost Plus in the Farmer's Market. He was dressed in a casual button-down shirt and jeans - nothing special. He didn't seem to attract any attention until he walked up to the register. The clerk gushed uncontrollably, and a couple patrons nearly sustained neck injuries from all the craning.

· Friday night Southwest flight, Phoenix to LAX: Gary Busey, preboarding and sitting on the aisle in the first row, thus forcing every weary weekly business traveler to inch around his massive teeth and crazy eyes. He had a huge metal briefcase full of cassette tapes and travel guides. He got up at one point and poked his head into the cockpit, making the other passengers nervous...especially the ones who recognized him. Dude is batshit.

· While lunching at Gabi's Mediterranean Cafe in Marina del Rey:

Adrian Pasdar of "Heroes" jogging by, but not flying. And hey, any guy who snagged Natalie Mains of the Dixie Chicks is a hero in my book...

...and a few minutes earlier, Ian Ziering — nee Steve Whosits of "Beverly Hills 90210" — trying to impress the waitresses and the girl at the skate rental shop across the street. Best overheard comment: "He used to be on TV or something, but that's a really nice bike." He was with a cute, young blonde lacking his ex-wife's unnatural endowments.

· After the Grove turned off the fake snow and hosed the babies off the singing fountain, a cool celebrity showed up - Dwight Yoakam and his cowboy boots took in a late night movie.

· Friday night, Formosa Cafe. Spotted Robert Sean Leonard, late of "House", with some friends. He's very tall, had sort of a tragic sweater on, and didn't set off my GayDar (which surprised me). I couldn't help but get excited—he was in "Dead Poet's Society"!!!!!!!!!!!! And he's a little hotter in person...Oh Captain, my Captain indeed!

· 11/18 at Century City Mall... weirdly spotted former Clinton Secretary of State Warren Christopher near Ann Taylor. Another passerby asked me who he was and was supremely disappointed that he was a former cabinet secretary and not some actor who might've played a stodgy neighbor on an old sitcom...

· "For Your Consideration" star Jane Lynch buying a ticket (solo, alas) to "Shut Up and Sing" at Laemmle 5 at noon on Thanksgiving Day. Really wanted to offer to share my floor tickets to Friday's Dixie Chicks concert at the Staples Center, but I thought that might be a bit too stalkerish.

· Monday, November 27 noon, the Beverly Hills Public Library. Because that's how I roll.

I enter the reference "study tables" section in search of a place to plug in my laptop. I find a table where only one other person is sitting. A morbidly obese person, but, hey, there's still plenty of room for me.

As I get plugged in, his wheezy, labored breathing begins to distract me. I look at him and realize its none other than noted fat Awards Show writing hack Bruce Vilanch, red glasses and all. He's wearing a green "What Wouldn't Jesus Do?" T-shirt and reading - wait for it - "The Devil's Guide to Hollywood," by Joe Eszterhas. As I moved tables to get away from the wheezing - dude seriously needs another season of "Celebrity Fit Club"- and began working on my own crappy script I smiled, buoyed by the reminder that my own mediocrity might not prevent me from making it big someday. Well, not as big as Bruce. Nobody else will ever be that huge.

· Saturday (11/25), a friend and I were in line for the 8 p.m. Upright Citizens Brigade show when my friend moved away from the line in order to smoke a cigarette. As he did so, a tiny fellow approached those of us in line and very earnestly asked if we had a light. None of us did, but I said, "That guy does, over there," pointing to my friend. The little man got a light from my friend and all was well. After a moment, my friend and I traded places so that I could finish his cigarette (I'm a casual user), and I was standing a few feet from the small gentleman when a couple of passersby stopped to tell him they enjoyed his work. This baffled me, as I did not recognize him as being famous. Perhaps they meant his work smoking cigarettes outside of black-box theaters. The mystery was solved some 20 minutes later, inside the theater, when the UCB folks introduced him as a guest performer: Simon Helberg, of "Studio 60." The wee, skinny, adorably large-nosed character is one of the performers in the fictional sketch series. I recall pegging him as Studio 60's Jimmy Fallon, though I cannot now recall any impressions he has done on the show, nor any sketches during which he inappropriately giggled.

In the audience at the same UCB show was Jason Ritter, son of famed stumblebum John Ritter. He was short, though not nearly as petite as Simon Helberg, and was accompanied by a few friends, male and female, all in their early to mid-20s like himself. Seating at UCB is first-come first-served, but of course Jason Ritter had arranged to have seats taped off for him and his friends. He laughed heartily throughout the show, including the parts about the Holocaust, cancer, and Holocaust cancer. (You had to be there.)

· I was stuck in traffic on Melrose on Friday and glanced into the Toyrobot store and saw Patrick Stump the lead singer of Fall Out Boy. Slightly hipster but not trying too hard. Just shopping like a normal person, not one person seemed to recognize him! Actually I think he was trying to get the attention of the salesperson. Awesome!