Lindsay Lohan Launches Hot New Bandaged-Wrist Trend

We all know where Lindsay Lohan stands on the panty issue (resolutely against), but it's the exposed slits on her wrists that have fans of the hard-partying starlet legitimately concerned. What had begun as the occasional self-inflicted, hangover-distracting puncture wound covered discretely with a Disney character Band-Aid now appears to have graduated into a much harder to camouflage, full-fledged self-mutilation habit:
Lohan's fans are alarmed by photos of the "Mean Girls" star that have appeared online and overseas, showing what seems to be scars on her wrists. The headline-making actress has been wearing casts and armbands on her wrists lately, but after the World Music Awards, was photographed with what seems to be both old and new cuts, as well as a burn in the shape of a figure eight.
While cutting is certainly nothing to be taken lightly, it was the description of the burned figure eight that we found most concerning: It's perhaps the single most regrettable case of voluntary celebrity branding since Bam Margera mangled his buttocks with a botched attempt at having a penis permanently singed onto them in Jackass Number Two. How Lohan managed to create this scarified infiniti symbol—or what its significance is—will undoubtedly become the topic of much theorizing and debate among the world's foremost Lohanologists in the months to come. Suffice it to say, however, that sometimes, when the scene at Hyde has long since ceased to provide any more novelty or distraction, the only thing that can really make one feel truly alive is two swift depressions from a Range Rover's glowing cigarette lighter.