· While Britney Spears' lawyers were drafting divorce papers on Monday, Kevin Federline (who almost instantaneously acquired the moniker "Fed-Ex" since news of the split) was doing an interview with MuchMusic in support of the rap career which now, tragically, becomes his sole means of support not involving the "borrowing" of meal money from Sean Preston and Jayden James during his weekend visitation window. At some point during the interview, Federline received a text message, turned ashen, and left the table for half an hour, perhaps indicating that was the moment he learned his marriage was over, putting him only a year or so behind the average InTouch reader. In the above video of the scene, you can almost see the sparkle drain from his bling. [via PerezHilton]
· Federline brags that he would've been famous by now without Britney, then about the ridiculousness of his watch and kick games. We expect that both games will become somewhat less ridiculous once he starts selling off their parts for rent money. [Salon, ad-watching req'd]
· Will K-Fed use a custody battle to extract some of the money that the ironclad Massey prenup protecting Spears' pop-tart fortune prevents him from getting? Yes, we expect that he will, or he's going to have to sell one of the babies at the first unsupervised opportunity. Guy's gotta eat. [TMZ.com]
· If they were forced to pinpoint the exact moment that Britney's love for Kevin died, Us would pick that time Spears stormed out of his album release party at Xenii on Halloween. But really, there are so many to choose from that this is mostly a pointless exercise. [Us Weekly]