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It's the oldest story in the art-dealing book, really: millionaire owns Picasso's "La Reve"; millionaire sells "La Reve" for record-breaking $139 million; millionaire invites friends for one last private viewing and, in his orgasmic enthusiasm over the subject's secret cranial phallus, rapes it with his wildly excited elbow. Author, screenwriter, and Huffington Post blogger Nora Ephron witnessed casino owner Steve Wynn's very surprising, and unfortunately somewhat hilarious, penetration of his favorite — and indeed, no longer completely his — painting, yet tragically resisted her baser instincts to document it.

I was holding my digital camera in my hand - I'd just taken several pictures of the Picasso - and I wanted to take a picture of the Picasso with the hole in it so badly that my camera was literally quivering. But I didn't see how I could take a picture - it seemed to me I'd witnessed a tragedy, and what's more, that my flash would go off if I did and give me away.

Full details of Wynn's untimely canvas-piercing fervor after the jump.

[Wynn] was standing in front of the painting at this point, facing us. He raised his hand to show us something about the painting — and at that moment, his elbow crashed backwards right through the canvas.

There was a terrible noise.

Wynn stepped away from the painting, and there, smack in the middle of Marie-Therese Walter's plump and allegedly-erotic forearm, was a black hole the size of a silver dollar - or, to be more exactly, the size of the tip of Steve Wynn's elbow — with two three-inch long rips coming off it in either direction. Steve Wynn has retinitis pigmentosa, an eye disease that damages peripheral vision, but he could see quite clearly what had happened.

"Oh shit," he said. "Look what I've done."

Now, now, Steve, dry your eyes — we're sure this isn't the first time a man's curious elbows have claimed the virginity of a painting valued at nine figures. Why, just the other day, a friend's nephew poked his spoonful of mushed carrots through his recent drawing called "Happy Mommy Pet Giraffe." He was devastated. But at least yours won't end up in the trash, if Ephron's happy ending is to be believed.

I called Elaine Wynn and told her the New Yorker was going to write a story and that Steve should call the reporter back and tell him about it, since no question the story was out there.

Elaine told me that she was glad I'd called because she had awakened that morning with the realization that Steve's putting his elbow through the painting had been a sign that they were meant to keep the painting. So they were going to.

See? It was destiny. It had nothing to do with somebody no longer wanting to drop $139 mil on a Picasso with a large black hole where its virtue had been. And it's great news for Ikea, whose wide range of delightful mass-produced posters are going to be the only ones Elaine Wynn allows her husband to hang in his office ever again.