Who Breaks a Slutterfly On a Wheel? Mouth-Foaming Postie, That's Who
Like most people, we've found the whole Madonna-adopting-a-Maliwian-boy intensely distasteful on so many levels. But who, we wondered, would correctly articulate our discomfort? Step forward Andrea Peyser of the Post, whose sour visage should somehow become a recognized emoticon for the wagging finger. In calm, emotionless prose, Peyser makes her case against Madonna's - wait a sec, we're just now reading the whole thing and HOLY FUCKING SHIT.
Madonna, the sluttish, egomaniacal mother-of-the-century has topped even her most revolting self. She plans to remove a baby from the loving arms of his dirt-poor father, in one of the most desperate nations on earth. Madonna has traveled far beyond her bra-baring, intercourse-simulating, public girl-kissing, Jesus-emulating loser antics to grab attention - and flesh. The one-named wonder, who already has given birth to two children by two different daddies, one of whom she would not deign to marry, has her heart set on raping Malawi.
And those are just paragraphs two through four; it only gets crazier. Jesus Christ, we're actually starting to feel some sympathy for Madonna. Our advice to anyone at the Post: if you've come into any contact with Andrea recently get treated for rabies immediately. There are certain things that aren't worth taking chances over.
