Impish Local Tells Michael Jackson That 'Leprechaun' Is Gaelic For 'Horny Ten-Year-Old Boy'
Even with Neverland Ranch now a shuttered wasteland in tragic disrepair, patrolled by starving llamas hoping to find sustenance by desperately gnawing on the Elephant Man's abandoned bones, Michael Jackson still hasn't given up on his dreams of manifesting the arrested fantasies of an abbreviated childhood in theme park form. After a brief dalliance with the deliciously slippery possibilities Bahraini waterslides, the erstwhile King of Pop may have decided to mine the mythology of his current country of residence, Ireland, for his next theme park project:
"Michael is deadly serious about this idea," a source told Ireland's Daily Mirror. "He loves the whole idea of leprechauns and the magic and myths of Ireland. It would cost around 500 million Euros [about $635 million] to do. He's always wanted to open his own theme park and he thinks Ireland is the perfect place and it will all be built around the leprechaun theme."
Given widespread reports of the singer's financial problems, the enormous start-up capital required for the park might seem daunting. But Jackson has never been one to let such practical roadblocks stand in the way of his dreams, especially when they involve giddy children in green top hats bobbing for gilded coins in the Pot O' Gold-themed hot tub in which he's soaking.