Defamer Real Estate: Swear Off Ambien In The 'Elm Street' House
For those of you currently looking to buy in what is becoming on overwhelmingly crowded real estate market, allow us to guide you to a new listing that may interest fans of Johnny Depp's early oeuvre and dream-stalking serial killers alike: 1428 N. Genesee Ave., otherwise known as the house from A Nightmare On Elm Street:
1428 N GENESEE AVE LOS ANGELES, CA 90046 $1,095,000 4 Bed, 3.5 Bath
Nightmare on Elm Street house with basement for "Freddie" Kruger. Spaulding Square fixer opportunity screaming "Buy Me, Buy Me!". With some work this could be your Family Dream Home, backyard with pool 4 entertaining, 4 bedrooms 3.5 bath & office. Terrific living room with fireplace, formal dining room and bar set up.
As with any realty ad, there is a good deal of understatement at play: "Some work" means you'll probably want to replace the main staircase, as the current one tends to turn into goop without warning, plus one of the bedrooms has some torn up wallpaper and a nasty, stubborn stain on the ceiling. Besides that though, it's a lovely home in a lovely neighborhood, if you don't mind the creepy kids in white playing jump rope outside all day and the mom-shaped window in the front door. There—we think we've hit every Elm Street house joke we could think of. Feel free to add your own in the comments section.