As we mentioned before, we missed the premiere of Fox's Celebrity Duets last night, but thanks to our friends at The Malcontent, we can reach our final resting place knowing we have witnessed at long last the Leah Thompson/Michael Bolton musical pairing that for too long has eluded us. Luckily, we stuck around long enough to catch this montage of judge Little Richard, who fills the all-important, "loopy wildcard" center chair, as popularized by Emmy cash bar patron Paula Abdul. But where Paula fed contestants a steady stream of tears, stiff-armed clapping, and slurred, up-with-people sentiments, Richard delivers a sober—yet equally incomprehensible—style of Tourette's Syndrome critique, burying Chris Jericho beneath a stuttered avalanche of ecstatic, involuntary verbal tics, before ultimately embracing his secret, lusty appetite for former pro-wrestlers.