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You might recall that developer and Democratic bagman Charles Kushner, father of new New York Observer owner Jared Kushner, was sentenced to two years' incarceration for "18 counts of tax evasion, witness tampering and illegal campaign donations," not to mention hiring a hooker to seduce his brother-in-law, thus punishing Kushner's sister for cooperating with investigators. However, our crowded penal system can only hold so many billionaires, so Kushner the elder has been living at a Newark halfway house, with an expected release in "late August." If Charles Kushner does indeed walk early (we're assuming he's getting parole, time served, etc. — heard anything?), we hope he gets a column at the Observer. He could tell us about life on the inside, and all the twisted schemes he had to create just for survival's sake. Just like in Prison Break, only with work release and movie night.

[Photo: Getty Images]