Poor, dedicated WWD reporter Jeff Bercovici undergoes the ultimate sacrifice — previewing Men's Health editor and iron cocksman Dave Zinczenko's authoritative new book, Men, Love & Sex: The Complete User's Guide for Women. Zinczenko, with his co-editor, MH contributor Ted Spiker, intend to generously decipher the mystery of testicles for women everywhere through their mastery of metaphor. Some examples:

• "A lot of men feel about as secure as a carton of Twinkies in the middle of a Curves studio."

• "When we're trying to get to know you, we've got more butterflies than a Costa Rican guidebook."

• "Don't long for a man who will chatter more than a hula dancer in Alaska."

• "We know the size of the drill isn't supposed to matter as much as the battery-pack that powers it."

• "Think of a great relationship as though it were a great meal: A delicious, meaty steak of sexual passion, and a fine, delicate wine of romance and commitment."

Wow. Give us a second to catch our breath. Dan Rather is an incredible ghostwriter, isn't he?

Unpacking the Male Mind [WWD]