Word.

Bill Gates's Microsoft retirement memo didn't need such a fancy translation. His Valleyspeak could be summed up with a classic trick from Slate. The online magazine pulled out an archived article from its days as a Microsoft property. The schtick: use MS Word's Autosummarize feature to whittle a document down to the nitty gritty.

That trick boils Gates's thirteen-paragraph memo down to:

Right now and for the next two years, my full-time job is here at Microsoft, and my part-time job remains the Foundation. I feel very lucky that we've got extraordinary technical leaders at the company, like Ray Ozzie and Craig Mundie, who can step up to assume the roles that I've played. Together, we've built a great company whose products have empowered people around the world.

Boring? Not if you notice who's missing. Yep, Word figures CEO Steve Ballmer is out of the picture.

If only.

Earlier: Valleyspeak: Bill Gates's internal e-mail [Valleywag]
Bill Gates' e-mail to employees [Seattle P.I.]
Cogito Auto Sum [Slate]