There was a tense moment at the National Spelling Bee earlier today when a precocious contestant repeatedly challenged her misspelling of "paparazzo" by referring to ample evidence of an alternate, colloquial spelling of P-A-V-A-R-O-T-T-I in the canon of Kevin Federline. Eventually, the judge relented and allowed the girl to continue in the competition, muttering something about "the total defilement of everything we hold dear."