Fabian Basabe's Guide to Oozing Confidence
The Miami Herald's advice column, the Advice Diva, rescues socialite "it" thing Fabian Basabe from obscurity and dubs him "Guest Diva" (good to see that they're honest enough journalists down there to do away with any masculine pretense). Some of his tips for self-confidence:
1. The more you think like a confident person, the more likely you are to get what you want.
The more you think you should be famous for doing nothing, the more you will be famous for doing nothing. You'll be rewarded with your own reality show, the ultimate acheivement.
2. Know what you want. Are you sure of what it is you want? If you want something badly enough, there is no reason you should not have it.
Before you go down to the Dominican Republic and marry her, be sure you've found what you want in a beard.
3. Be passionate.
When near scantily clad men, dance like nobody's watching.
4. Be a rebel.
Swing from the rafters. Demand your Prada. Fuck political correctness — if a bouncer is a "negro," you have every right to say so!