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This say-it-ain't-so memo just in from HBO headquarters on Bryant Park:

Sent: Friday, May 12, 2006 8:16 AM
Subject: Catering Policy: Friday Bagels

Dear Team:

Sadly, we have to discontinue our Friday bagel tradition since it does not within HBO's catering rules (see below). It's essential that we comply with all corporate guidelines so effective today we our ending our bagel purchases.

Thank you for your understanding.

After the jump, the full catering policy, which says no to birthday parties but yes to baby showers — if you have at least 10 years of service.

From: *HBO Employee Communications (HBO)
Sent: Tuesday, April 25, 2006 10:09 AM
To: *HBO Employee Communications (HBO)
Subject: Catering Policy Reminder

To: Vice Presidents & Above

Date: April 25, 2006

Re: Catering Policy Reminder

During a recent audit of HBO's catering expenses, we noted an increase in catering requisitions submitted without proper approval or a clearly stated business purpose for the expense.

As part of our continued focus on cost containment and responsible corporate practices, please review these HBO policies with your staff:

∑ Catering for business meetings should be modest and appropriate for the occasion. The business purpose and list of attendees (email invitation will suffice) must be stated on the catering requisition.

∑ Catering for retirements, baby showers, and employees leaving HBO is permitted. The employee retiring or leaving HBO must have completed 10 or more years of service. Catering requisitions for these events must be pre-authorized by the department's Senior Vice President.

∑ Catering for employee transfers, promotions, birthdays, anniversaries, holiday staff parties, or any other non-business occasion or reason is not permitted.

Please distribute this memo to those in your department who are involved with catering requisitions. Should you have any questions, please feel free to call the Accounts Payable Department.

Thank you for your cooperation.