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Newly solvent, noseless superstar Michael Jackson was roused in the middle of the night after colleagues in New York got wind of a rumor that the singer had died in his sleep:

In the middle of the night, two nights ago, Michael Jackson's valet got a call from his boss' financial partners in New York. They'd heard rumors, started on Web sites, that Jackson had died overnight in Bahrain. [...]

The new rumor was so upsetting that I am told a Sony Music financial officer spoke to the valet — probably a security guard who travels with Jackson named Kerry — and asked him if it was true. The guard then went into Jackson's room and woke him up — it was the middle of the night in Bahrain — to make sure he was still alive.

The singer was disoriented at first, but once the valet explained what happened, he chuckled, adding "Where do these ridiculous, hurtful rumors get started?" Then, the corpse-like, skull-faced King of Pop dismissed his employee, shut the lights and returned to a blissful slumber in his oxygen-chamber sleeping casket.