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• For their weepy reality show Extreme Makeover: Home Edition, ABC casting execs are hunting for families with multiple children born with Down's Syndrome — or, even better, kids suffering from Progeria, aka "little old man's disease." Sad, but we always knew Ty Pennington was bad news. Never trust a dude in a hemp necklace. [TSG]
• Through the power of lemonade, one girl will try to save Lil' Kim from the harsh realities of prison life — now in pre-production for Lifetime. [Philadelphia Will Do]
• How to be a really questionable curator, courtesy of those daffy dilletantes at the Whitney. [Art Fag City]
• We're not sure if the author of the following post is really named Jen, but could she actually be the mythical Evelyn the Food Whore? [Craigslist]
• Wearing Prada loafers for your Condé Nast job interview means nothing if your family isn't sitting on piles of money. [Almost Girl]
• Who uses Meetup these days? Rat people, that's who. [Meetup]
• You're not going to believe this, but: Celebrity publicists use gossip columns as PR tools. We know, we know — is nothing sacred? [OPRN]
• Last but certainly not least, the kings and queens of Manhattan now know how to shit like royalty. [NYM]