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Thanks to yesterday's record-setting tech woes, we never had the chance to tell you how we really feel:

• Chloe is crowned demi-queen of Project Runway; as one eagle-eyed reader noted, her designs resemble some of those featured in the final scenes of Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead. Now that the show is done and you're back to being a lonely loser, try getting laid with some tips from former cast members. [Nerve]
• On Laura Albert, the mastermind of the JT Leroy hoax: "It was an incredible show, and most of the credit goes to a punk-rock mom in San Francisco who wrote porn and did phone sex for a living." [Salon]
• The secrets of Us Weekly's bedraggled art staff, one of whom, we suspect, writes all those cute scribbles on the pages — we just love those. [PDN]
• Literary heavyweights like Paul Auster and Daniel Hoffman scramble to lose weight before the Columbia Review's reunion. [NY Sun]
• New Yorkers don't fall for those cutesy Snapple lids. [NYT]
• Lil' Kim is capable of hating something every day for the rest of her life. [Critical TV]
• Turn on your volume, tear a hole in your striped sweater, and apply your eyeliner while listeing to the Emo Song. [YTMND]

[Image via Jen Snow's Flickr]