We can all breathe a sigh of relief: As recent photographs indicate, almost overcompensatingly so (careful, there, big man, you're gonna squish the life out of the little thing!), Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are still very much a sexless item. And yet, those pesky rumors continue to hog up precious internet bandwidth: For example, Best Week Ever Blog throws this mashup into the mix a "What if?" scenario that pits the James Frey-flogging, truth-seeking Oprah against everyone's favorite sofa-trampoline artist in fake-love. You come away feeling an enormous sense of relief, that someone had the balls to finally say it even knowing all along that the "someone" was a guy with access to a couple TiVoed Oprahs and an Avid editing bay.