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Anyone who's ever sacrificed three hours of their lives to the Grammys show know that no one actually cares who wins, only who plays; five minutes after the show, that year's Best New Artist disappears into obscurity, but the unholy noises created by the centerpiece mash-up performance of Bono, Tim McGraw, any former boy-bander with a new solo album, and the ghost of George Harrison will induce uncomfortable auditory hallucinations for months (and now, abetted by iTunes, potentially forever). According to the LAT, nobody knows this better than music executives and managers, who'll move heaven and earth to insure their clients get to lip-sync in front of an audience of millions:

No wonder music executives go to the mat to secure a spot on the lineup. In 1998, for example, then-Sony Music head Tommy Mottola threatened to withhold future appearances by Jennifer Lopez and Destiny's Child if a relatively unknown Latin singer named Ricky Martin was not given airtime.


"I used every form of manipulation and pressure you can imagine to make it happen," said Mottola, who said he even called CBS Chief Executive Leslie Moonves to make his case. Martin sang "La Copa de la Vida" at the 1999 Grammys, where he also won the best Latin performance award. By the end of the year, the singer had sold 9 million records, an eightfold increase over his previous sales.

The very, very devilish Mottola hounded Moonves day and night, playing Martin's song over the phone and begging the mogul to shoehorn the artist into the Grammys telecast. Moonves initially dismissed the music as "lobotomized, Iglesias-lite Muzak," prompting the record exec to dispatch Martin to demonstrate the range of his talents in person. After a few minutes of uninspired caterwauling, Moonves remained unimpressed—that is, until Martin's big finish, in which the singer finally turned the firehose of his passion on the man who held the key to his fame and fortune. One drenched, ruined suit and one excited phone call to Mottola later, Martin was well on his way to Grammy immortality.