This week's a very special time for Intern Alexis: It's her first interracial encounter! In her latest review of the Times Book Review, nestled comfortably between talk of sad whores and elitist education, you can find Alexis' deflowering by the penis of African-American author E. Lynn Harris. After the jump, Intern Alexis becomes a Woman.

Memories of My Melancholy Whores
 By Gabriel Garcia Marquez
Reviewed by Terrence Rafferty

We use the word 'pup,' for real. As a verb, a noun, a proper noun, this word is on the tip of our tongues basically all the time. We use it uptown, downtown, midtown, out of town, even. We had to wonder, then, Terrence Rafferty, are you stalking us?? In his review of Gabriel Garcia Marquez's new one, "Memories of My Melencholy Whores," he writes: "But the writer was only in his 50's, a mere pup, when he invented Florentino Ariza and granted him that elderly fool for love the belated fulfillment of his desire." Woof woof!


Hung: A Meditation on the Measure of Black Men in America
 By Scott Poulson-Bryant
Reviewed by E. Lynn Harris

Our blood floweth'd a little quickereth than usual when we read E. Lynn Harris's review of Scott Poulson-Bryant's big black cockathon. Yes, it's really and truly a book about Poulson-Bryant and his (not that large) throbbing member! This reminded us of Toni Bentley and her book all about anal sex and this, in turn, reminded us of our early days of Reading About Reading and we got a bit teary of eye. At this point, we were feeling emotionally vulnerable so we were particularly touched by these here words by E. Lynn Harris:

Poulson-Bryant's obsession with all this began when an older cousin told him that the size of his penis went a long way to determining his status as a man. (Funny thing I was told the same thing by an uncle when I reached puberty.)

Awwwwwwwww. We think it's so so sweet when people can bond over having creepy, maybe-this-was-sexual-harassment?-infused stories about pervy relatives!!!


Restless Giant
 By James T. Patterson
Reviewed by Charles Peters

Charles Peters laments that in James T. Patterson's survey of recent American History, "Restless Giant," there are some "important matters" that Patterson fails to expand upon: "One example is the rise of the meritocracy and the accompanying obsession with test scores, school admission and the acquisition of badges of taste and intellect recognizable by other members of the educated elite "

What's that you say, Charles Peters? You want more about the educated elite? We'll give you some more educated elite! Just ask your child's S.A.T. tutor to read you aloud this week's Review. In addition to reviewing "a novel about teachers and students at a private school in Riverdale" by Benjamin Markovits, the NYTBR got the person in the whole entire world most obsessed with test scores, school admissions and badges of taste and intellect, Sir David Brooks, to review "The Chosen: The Hidden History of Admission and Exclusion at Harvard, Yale, and Princeton." Don't egg on the NYTBR, Peters! They're on it already!