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Still with me? Hang in there! We're almost done! I'll let you in on a little secret: this Defamer stuff isn't as easy as it looks! You should all be nicer to Mark. Or Maria. Or whatever gets off that plane.
Friday:
 · Love, Bukowski opens at the California Repertory Company, showcasing a unique performance of Charles Bukowski s work. If all you know about Bukowski can be summed up by 'Mickey Rourke' and 'drank a lot,' you should probably check it out. And by 'you,' I mean 'I.'
· Meet Jon Polito and Jeff Inspiration for The Big Lebowski's 'The Dude' Dowd at the Laemmle Fairfax Theatre, then take in a screening of Polito s new film, Charlie The Ox. If all you know about Lebowski is 'Jeff Bridges' and 'smoked up a lot,' you should probably...I think you see where this is going.
Saturday
 · Perfect for the long-distance runner who watches too much VH1: Nike Run Hit Wonder. Run a 5- or 10-k around the Los Angeles Coliseum while being serenaded by Joan Jett, The Donnas, Fountains of Wayne, and DJ Z-Trip. Just try not to trip while you zip.
· "If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball." No truer words have ever been spoken. Prove them correct at the Mork & Mindy Co-Ed Classic Dodgeball Tournament at the Bellevue Rec Center: 1980s-style fun for all ages and skill levels. Please don't show up coked up in a red unitard.
Sunday
 · If seeing Uncle Jesse playing the congos with a legendary band or seeing Gary Sinise perform in a band named after his character from Forrest Gump sounds like a good time, then this show is for you: The Beach Boys featuring special guest John Stamos, Gary Sinise & the Lt. Dan Band and more at the Greek Theater. I have no idea what any of this means but the intern sent it to me and I'm too exhausted to rewrite it. (See 'Defamer: harder than looks.')