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It's Emmy weekend, and we understand if you want to lock yourself indoors and mentally prepare yourself for all of the Desperate Housewives acceptance speeches. But the movie world will do its best to lure you out of your TV cocoon and steal your money in exactly the following way:

1. Just Like Heaven—$25 million
We're on Mark Ruffalo's side, we really are. But we can't decide what's the more upsetting career move, trying to get inside a plastic-surgery ravaged Meg Ryan in In the Cut or attempting to penetrate Reese Witherspoon's unbearably cute ghost. Can humans and spirits even copulate? We guess we'll have an answer to that paranormal mystery soon enough.

2. Lord of War—$15 million
Nicolas Cage, briefly the Biggest Movie Star in the World with the surprise megahit National Treasure, will not even be the Biggest Movie Star This Weekend. Gird yourself for more theatrical moping.

3. The Exorcism of Emily Rose—$14 million
Now that Emily Rose has finished feasting on opening weekend mallrats, they'll play up the God vs. Satan angle and chase some Christians around the multiplex.

4. The 40 Year-Old Virgin—$6 million
As reported yesterday, Steve Carell struck again. With virtually every minute of their red-hot client's work life contracted out to studios for the next couple of years, his agents are currently taking pitches for half-baked ideas that Carell will be talked into accepting sometime in 2007.

5. Transporter 2—$5 million
Seriously, though. Can ghosts and people fuck? This is going to drive us nuts all weekend.