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Shortly after discussing her recent suspicion that there may not in fact be a tiny penguin extinguishing the light each time she closes her refrigerator, Tara Reid finally reveals that she wasn't born with two gigantic bags of saline inside her chest:

Tara Reid has confessed to having breast surgery. The 'American Pie' star has long denied going under-the-knife but has now admitted she has had her chest surgically enhanced. She said: "I mean, everyone does it. I don't know why I'm the one who gets so much attention?"

Sorry, we forgot to warn you to sit down before reading this startling admission, and hope you weren't injured from being hurled against the wall behind you by the propulsive force of the "No duh!" you reflexively unleashed. Reid's infamous red-carpet slippage (link NSFW, or for those with weak hearts) notwithstanding, she does raise a valid point. But that's the kind of question best contemplated while dangling placidly from a parasail over a Greek island with your favorite amateur pornstar heiress, as a basic cable camera crew gently asks you not to hurl the empty bottle of designer vodka at the fishing boats below; those are the only moments where we truly gain insight into such existential dilemmas.

Bonus: CityRag has helpfully timelined Reid's chest, from washboard to mountain range, for your viewing pleasure.