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This Sunday's LA Times Magazine went foraging through the detritus currently "circling the pop-culture drain" at the area's 99 Cent stores, and while trying to discern the connection that made Queen Amidala and body wash seems like a match made in retail tie-in heaven, discovered a quiet indictment of the twilight of Michael Eisner's tenure at Disney:

Eisner-Era Collectibles
 Items: "Jungle 2 Jungle: A Junior Novel," by Nancy Krulik; "George of the Jungle" movie scrapbook; "Atlantis: The Lost Empire" reusable sticker book; "The Country Bears: The Junior Novelization"; "Lion King 2: Simba's Pride" Pez dispenser; Energizer "The Lion King" collectible squeeze lights (Timon and Pumbaa)

So who brought down Eisner? Was it Steve Jobs, Roy Disney, the Weinsteins? Ignore the men. Follow the merchandise. Consider these items. Separately, they're all half-remembered pieces of schlock. Together, they're a stinging indictment of a corporate leader's decidedly mixed record, whether he was adapting French movies for American audiences ("Jungle 2 Jungle"), devaluing the catalog of hits by doing another direct-to-video knockoff ("Simba's Pride") or green-lighting a big-budget film based on country music-playing bears ("The Country Bears"). This isn't merchandise. It's bomb debris. The whole power struggle at Disney might have been avoided if Roy Disney had simply held an emergency shareholders meeting at the local 99 Cents Only Store. Michael Eisner would have left quickly and quietly after that.

Among the other obsolescent pop-personages currently occupying the shelf-space of despair at the discount store: David Hasselhoff (a DVD, not the actor himself...yet), various boy bands, Anna Kournikova, the Spice Girls, and the Barbi Twins. That sounds the VIP list of a Hollywood club the night after Lindsay Lohan and various That 70s Show stars decide the place across the street is way hotter.