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As efficient as two shots from a silenced Walther P38 to the back of the head and as ruthlessly effective as a story in the trades, a simple phone call ended Pierce Brosnan's reign as James Bond.

"One phone call, that's all it took!" the 52-year-old actor tells Entertainment Weekly magazine in its Aug. 19 issue. [...] Brosnan says he's grateful to have had the role, but adds: "It never felt real to me. I never felt I had complete ownership over Bond. Because you'd have these stupid one-liners — which I loathed — and I always felt phony doing them."

We've been dreading this day, though not because we're going to miss Brosnan doing the shaken-not-stirred schtick. Now that he's been officially de-tuxedoed, it's going to be even harder for us to ignore rumors that each and every actor with the kind of accent that sounds acceptably classy and exotic to Americans is "about to be named" as the next Bond. Wake us up when the press release announcing that MGM/Sony has boldy cast Jude Law's penis (like many smaller-than-expected action stars, it can stand on an apple box to seem taller—movie magic!) is issued.