Butterscotch Stallion Vs. The Shark
The Australian surf, Owen Wilson in a wetsuit, and the most efficient killing machine that Nature has ever produced—the stage is set for that classic theoretical match-up of two of the world's most irresistible forces, The Butterscotch Stallion Vs. The Shark. From the Sydney Morning Herald:
American actor Owen Wilson may be used to swimming with the "sharks" in Hollywood, but when it comes to the real thing in Sydney he's not quite so sure.
Spike's moles report Wilson, in town for the launch of his latest flick Wedding Crashers in which he co-stars with Isla Fisher, was swimming at Tamarama late yesterday when a civic-minded surfer spotted a shark. The surfer told Wilson he should get back to the beach as there was a shark nearby. "It looked like a wobbegong and went straight under my board and was heading towards him. He did a pretty brisk freestyle to the beach when I told him there was a shark," the shy surfer, who asked to remain anonymous, told us. We hear Wilson was more than a little gobsmacked that Sydney's beaches are also popular with sharks, thanking the surfer before being whisked off inland in a black chauffeur-driven Mercedes-Benz limo.
Climbing into a chauffeured stretch Benz isn't exactly defiantly flipping that golden mane and proudly galloping away, but the Stallion's got to pick his battles. Better to swim to the safety of the shore, quietly formulating the version he's going to tell at the Playboy Mansion, which involves forming a little dorsal fin on the top of his head with his hand, popping out of the water, and yelling "Grotto Shark!" to a squealing audience of Misses March through August.
