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Here we are with our panties all in a bunch about Time reporter Matthew Cooper agreeing to testify and the New York Times' Judith Miller getting hauled off to jail, and we've gone and ignored the day's other Big Huge Legal Story of Earth-Shattering Proportions! Kimberly Jones (who some of you might know as the slightly-clothed rapper Lil' Kim) has just been sentenced to 12 months in prison for lying to a grand jury about her friends' involvement in a 2001 shooting outside the Hot 97 radio station studio. No doubt Kim is devasted — going down for perjury completely lacks street cred. Even Martha Stewart's insider trading tastes hardcore in comparison.

And now, the inevitable issue must be raised: Does "Lil' Kim" translate into a prison nickname? Or will Ms. Johnson be born anew like M. Diddy?

Rapper Lil' Kim Sentenced to a Year in Prison [Reuters]
Lil Kim Gets Three Times the Sentence, but has Four Times the Rack [NYO]