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Hollywood PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are sent in by our readers. Send yours to tips@defamer.com (putting “privacywatch” or “sighting” in the subject line helps immensely) and let the world know that you have an amazingly ability to differentiate between the Olsen twins.

[Ed.note—Due to "logistical difficulties," it's been a long time since we've run PrivacyWatch. Some sightings were lost in the interim, and for that we heartily apologize. It will never happen again, and we promise to stop compiling these posts while huffing Sharpies. Now lose the next 45 minutes wading through the roughly 3,000 items we managed not to lose.]

In today's long-delayed, summer-blockbuster-sized episode: Owen "The Butterscotch Stallion" Wilson x2; Renee Zellweger; Prince; Tobey Maguire; Drew Barrymore, Lauren Ambrose, and Freddy Rodriguez; Lindsay Lohan; Britney Spears, K-Fed, and James Marsden; David Hasselhoff and Cheech Marin; Dennis Hopper and Jared Leto; Kirsten Dunst; Kirsten Dunst, JK Simmons, and Chris Parnell; Ed Norton; Hank Azaria; Famke Janssen, Beck, Marissa and Giovanni Ribisi, and Erik Palladino; Matthew Perry; Sissy Spacek and "Starlet" Michelynne; Barry Bonds; Kate Hudson, Michael Bay, Scary Spice, and Ryan Cabrera; Bridget Moynahan and French Stewart; Nora Ephron, Tom Ford, and Constantine Maroulis; Mila Kunis and McCauley Culkin; Gina Gershon; Mary-Kate Olsen and Vincent Gallo; Ashley Olsen; Jessica Simpson; Lance Bass, Wilmer Valderrama, and Leelee Sobieski; Giovanni Ribisi, Shannon Sossamon, Jason Lee, and Alex Greenwald; Ashlee Simpson; Dave Navarro; Juliette Lewis and Chuck Woolery; Eriq LaSalle; Dennis Miller; Amber Valletta; Steve Guttenberg; Tim Meadows and Danny Bonaduce; Danny Bonaduce.


· Saw Owen "The Butterscotch Stallion" Wilson at Giorgio Baldi tonight. Fortunately, my husband and I were able to surreptitiously communicate to one another that "BSS just walked in." The young Midwestern couple at the table next to us was twittering at each other, openly staring as BSS was seated a few tables away, ready to dine with two friends. A woman at the table next to the Midwesterners picked up on their excitement, leaned over and said, "Who is it? Is it someone famous? What was he in?" We didn't hear Ohio's response, just the explanation, "He was in 'Old School'? Did you see the movie 'Old School'?" They were talking loud enough for BSS to overhear, we're certain. By the way, Ohio, it was Owen's brother Luke who starred in "Old School." We're unsure whether BSS's feelings were hurt at this rather loud mistake.

· The Butterscotch Stallion himself, front row at Dodger Stadium, 6/27, reading the LA Times like he was sitting at his kitchen table.

· at Quality sunday (6/26) around 11 for brunch (yummy biscuits) and saw renee zellweger. at first, she was seated at a table right by the restrooms, which was odd, cuz everyone had to pass right by her on their way to the john. she didn't even have sunglasses on. apparently, it was just a table to seat her movie star ass on while waiting for her choice table—the plebians wait on the sidewalk. she was later seated outside, with a couple and child, with movie star big-ass sunglasses.

· I saw Prince (Rogers Nelson) at the newsstand on Beverly Dr. yesterday (6/30). He was pointing out magazines (I think home décor?) for his bodyguard to purchase for him. Teeny tiny with full pompadour. When he was finished, he climbed into the back of his awaiting chauffeur-driven Escalade while the bodyguard paid. All three were in suits.

· Saw Tobey Maguire at the Arcade Fire/David Byrne Concert at the Hollywood Bowl last night (6/26). He looked like he had made a wrong turn after his audition for a Bright Eyes biopic, dressed in his most sensitive indie gear, blue turtleneck sweater, and camouflage pants. He didn't seem as fat as reported,
but he certainly is as short as you'd expect. He was with his girlfriend I believe, who looked like a cross
between Katinka from Zoolander and Fidel Castro, dressed in green Castro Cuban army cap and camos
herself.

· 06/27 David Byrne/Arcade Fire @ Hollywood Bowl—Drew Barrymore with Strokes and a skanky Amanda de Cadenet-all posed graciously with a rubber chicken at the behest of some girl, who carries one in her purse. Lauren Ambrose & Freddy Rodriguez/Six Feet Under sitting up in the bleachers.

· I saw Andy Dick (7/1) this evening at the PetCo pet store in West Hollywood, of all places. He was coming out with a salesgirl, who was following him carrying a large white birdcage with a small bird inside. He directed the girl to put the bird in the back of the car, which was a black limo tinted Mercury of some sort — one of those cars with a driver. Then he hugged the salesgirl, jumped in the back of the car along with the bird and birdcage, and they went off into the Friday sunset.

· Lindsay Lohan was sunbathing at our pool at the Roosevelt! (where we were paying guests) When I tried to get a closer photo, with hubby & daughter in foreground, this very threatening musclebound woman stepped in front of the lens and said, "You will NOT take her photo!! Take a picture of your kid at the other end of the pool!" Well, let's just say I was persuaded and scurried to the shallow end. I should've told Miss Butchie that I mistook Lohan for a table umbrella.

· Saw K-Fed driving Britney down the PCH in her black convertible at 3:00ish. She was wearing a green maternity top, her hair pulled back, and eating what looked like fries. She was stopped at a light in malibu saw I got a good look, and she did not seem like the beached whale she is made out to be. Her and Kevin were smiling and seemed happy, and she looked pretty (a little pimply) but pretty nonetheless. Saw James Marsden (of X-Men fame) at Spider on friday. He was wearing camo pants, a baseball hat, and seemed wasted. He started flirting with some cute brunette girl who was major jail bait! In fact, I over heard him ask her how old she was and she just giggled. He was with a group of guys, and was quite nice (he didn't act like a celeb at all).

· Amid the many politicians at Mayor Villaraigosa's Inauguration today, I spotted David Hasselhoff. He was wearing a leather jacket which he took off to reveal a hideous button down shirt with an airbrushed eagle across his back. He is very tall and at one point was chatting with Cheech Marin. So much for the land of the stars.

· Two totally random sightings to inform you of...
Friday night (6/24) at the 10:25 showing of Land of the Dead was an equally zombie-ish Dennis Hopper sitting with Important Investor types in the front row. After the show he kinda hobbled about (looking mighty skinny/small and not as dapper as he appears in the film). When some super excited fanchick/virgin approached him to tell him how much she "dug" the movie he looked at her as if he was contemplating eating her flesh and then mumbled something and hobbled away off to roam Sunset with the other undead. Also at the West Hollywood Target—home to the subterranean clusterfuck parking lot—was the former Mr. Johannson, Jared Leto. Clad in full eyeliner (at 2 pm, mind you), Leto was checking out the home furnishings talking about how "awesome" and "kick ass" everything was and how he should "shop at Target more often." Leave Target for us plebes, its insulting to hear that you want to "cop that" $12.99 pillow (yes, he really said cop that).

· At sometime between 10 and 11 am (6/24) I saw Kirsten Dunst and an unidentified person walking away from the Starbucks on Santa Monica Blvd. She was wearing a navy blue t shirt, a demin skirt, and sky blue walking shoes. Her hair or make up didn't look done, and she was wearing black sunglasses. She walked right past me with her drink in hand, and I got a perfect look at her, it was definitely her. I didn't say anything to her, because her eyes were fixated on the guy walking with her. He had left her hand around her waist. His clothes looked a lot more upscale than hers, so it looked a little funny when they were walking together. He had on a black button up shirt untucked with a white shirt underneath, tan khaki pants, and black dress shoes. I put her at about 5 ft 6 in person, and he was way taller. Anywhere from 6 ft 2 to 6 ft 4 I would guess. He had black hair that was perfectly styled, it was put back, but not with a comb, it looked natural like it was done with water and not gel. He had dark color eyes, black or brown, not exactly sure which. He wasn't wearing sunglasses, and his skin had a slight olive tint to it. He does kinda look like the type of guys she is into. Think Jake Gyllenhaal but a bit taller, and stronger looking. She was giggling at something he said, and when i turned
around to get a better look he leaned in and gave her a kiss on the forehead. it looked like they were
drinking frappacino's, not sure what kind.

· fri night at musso and frank chris parnell. he's shorter than I thought he would be - other than that nothing much else to report. sun at urban outfitters on melrose of all places, kirsten dunst. she was rocking the full-length sundress, big sunglasses, boho look. but so was I so I can't really hate on that. she's a pretty girl who needs to stand up straight. she slouches badly. and last, today, at baja fresh on sunset/fairfax J.K. Simmons from law and order, spiderman and OZ with his wife and two really cute, really blond kids. his little girl spilled her soda and he was patient and sweet and not at all the scary neo-nazi skinhead we know and love from OZ. so that's my weekend. it turns out leaving the house is really the key to spotting celebs in this town.

· I was in line for movie tickets at the grove last night, and was busily recapping my relationship status with a girlfriend, when I was distracted by a seemingly familiar voice behind me. I turn around, and standing
uncomfortably close, was a baseball-capped, demure Ed Norton. He reminded me of every nondescript white guy I ever went to private school with and he was standing with a rather unimpressive bottle-blonde clutching a rather trite Louie Vuitton Bag. That said, I'm sure they are both lovely people.

· Sunday July 3 - Theater at The Grove. Spotted Hank Azaria chatting up a cute blonde with long braids and big black shades. They looked pretty into each other but then, he went into the theater and she took off with a group of friends.

· Sunday (7/3), I saw Famke Janssen at King's Road Cafe, where she apparently lives, because I see her every single time I go there, and she's always sitting at the same table. She looked gorgeous, and was with some guy that my brunch-mate assured me was in Punk'd, or Via La Bam or one of those shows in MTV that I don't watch anymore because I am too old. Monday brunch, I saw a ton of celebs at Quality. Right outside was a gaggle of Scientologists in the form of Beck and Mrs Beck, Marissa Ribisi, and Giovanni Ribisi with some other woman I didn't recognize. No babies in sight. I wonder what they think about their brethren, Crazy Tom Cruise. Inside was Erik Palladino [Dr Dave on ER]. He is mother-f'ing hot in person.

· I was downtown in Los Angeles this weekend and Matthew Perry was shooting some basketball thing. It looked like he was playing the coach of a bunch of old guys. He was dressed like Gene Hackman from Hoosiers. Could be a commerical but I asked and they said they couldn't tell me anything. They could be hiding something.

· Jamba Juice in Santa Monica, Tues. afternoon: The best dual-celeb sighting ever: Oscar-winning actress Sissy Spacek, sitting right next to...the winner of "The Starlet," Michelynne. The sad part is, Sissy Spacek seemed to recognize the Starlet, but not the other way around.

· I was at Red Buddha last Friday to hear Larry Vision deejay and I got a lot more than I bargained for. I got to not only see him, but also Kate Hudson, Ryan Cabrera, Michael Bay, and Scary Spice (!).

· Friday late afternoon, 6/24 - Bridget Moynahan from I, Robot (and Big's Natasha from Sex & the City) picking out dining room furniture at Design Within Reach in Santa Monica. Looking gorgeous sans make-up, she was down to earth when I asked her what she had decided on (we were looking at the same chairs). Saturday early evening, 6/25 - French Stewart, finishing up a smoke before ducking in the Lee Strasberg Institute on Santa Monica Blvd. Presumably taking a class in becoming untypecast as a quirky alien?

· I do physical therapy a few times a week at HealthSouth just off Howard Hughes Pkwy, right across the street from the mall with the big ol’ IMAX screen. I’ve been told by many people that this is where a lot of Big Famous Athletes go to get physical therapy re-hab, but I never noticed anyone at all famous until today. SF Giants Slugger and Alleged Steroid Cream Abuser (or Doper, as they say in the Olympics) Barry Bonds was on the table getting a tens unit and ice on his knee. He was friendly with the staff but there wasn’t a big rush of folks bothering him for attention, mainly because everyone there is hobbling along with injuries to the leg.

· On 6/24 saw Constantine (remember him?) at the Argyle. He was with a table of hipsters that included a couple of chain smokers. He's developed that "no eye contact with non-celebs" technique that celebrities are so good at. Should come in handy when he's back to riding the subway after his five minutes are up. Also sharing the confines that night were a talkative Nora Ephron, Robert Graham (Mr. Angelica Huston) and a very haughty looking Tom Ford.

· Spotted on a 9pm Sunday (6/26) flight from JFK to LAX on American Airlines:
Mila Kunis and McCauley Culkin. Although they weren't in steerage, they may as well have been. They were in the jam-packed business class section with me and I'm sure the legions of others who got a complimentary bump on their deeply discounted coach fare on this oversold flight. I was knocked out for most of the flight but noticed when I left that they'd left a MESS in their seats...bottles, crumbs and wrappers everywhere! Manners, manners, kids...

· Gina Gershon (ie: the star of the show that Elizabeth Berkeley pushes down the stairs in Showgirls) was in my yoga class Friday at noon at Bala Yoga. She came in late & left early. And I am way better at yoga than she is.

· I spotted Mary-Kate Olsen at Matsuhisa last night chowing down with her pals. She was with 3 guys (David Katzenberg wasn’t one of them) and 2 other girls. They seemed to be in pairs. The guys all seemed very young with super messy hair. The girls were Hollywood starlet wanna-be’s (super tall and skinny). They passed around a video camera - Mary Kate was very animated about what was on the video camera. She was definitely chowing down on sushi although she made 3 trips to the bathroom. In the middle of dinner, Vincent Gallo walked by with a friend who stopped by Mary Kate’s table to briefly talk with one of the girls.

· Today at 4:00 (6/24) I saw Ashley Olsen at Barney's on wilshire trying on shoes. There were tons of paparazzi and when she saw them she bolted out of the back door. She was so short I could barely see her.

· Yesterday evening at El Compadre on Susnet, Jessica Simpson having dinner with group of scruffy skater looking types. The paparazzi were waiting out back but she left through the front. Sorry no reports of what she ate or footsies with the skater dudes. She is pretty!

· I saw Lance Bass at Koi last night (6/29). He rushed by me at the bar to go to the private room in the back. I also saw Wilmer Valderrama and Leelee Sobieski at Concorde last night. They were sitting at a table wearing mathching fedoras. He was sitting up on the both so everyone in the club could see him - like he wanted the attention. The seemed somewhat affectionate but it looked pretty platonic..the nuzzled at one point briefly, but I did notice his wandering eye.

· it was a total hipster nation at the natural history museum last friday! rocking out to autolux were...
giovanni ribisi, shannon sossamon, jason lee, alex greenwald (phantom planet)

· Wish this were better, but ran into Ashlee Simpson at Yankee Doodle's on Wednesday (okay, I really debated whether or not to write this considering I was at Yankee Doodle's and I feel like I have to explai myself). She was with a creepy old dude wearing a played out Blues Brothers t-shirt. He could have been her dad (a minor detail: he ordered a LARGE Foster's) but wasn't because he was kissing up on her (that's Australian for "nasty").

· working out at equinox the other day i found myself entertained by some terrible reality show featuring george hamilton, but as i glanced away from the screen, nothing could have held my interest more (well,
actually that's a tremendous overstatement) than looking over to see dave navarro walk into the cardio area. he was fully decked out in some top-hat type thing that looked completely ridiculous, sunglasses, and lots of chains and bling-bling. didn't notice if his workout bag was a louis. i almost threw up a little bit in my mouth at that point, but it's a good thing i stuck around, because i got to catch snippets of his conversation with a fellow-worker-outer. i'm not sure who he was power walking alongside of on the treadmill, but he must have also been in a band because he kept referring to his own records throughout his conversation with d nav. some talking points i caught included the fact that dave is getting "tired of making records", that the process just doesn't appeal to him
like it used to. he also mentioned that he enjoys talk radio more than any other kind of radio. interesting. does that include intellectual talk radio, or just his visits to howard stern, where he gets to fondle
savannah? call me crazy, but somehow i just don't see navarro as the air america/npr type. on the bright side, he seemed very friendly, and said hello to lots of people walking around him.

· On Saturday afternoon, I was walking along Echo Park Avenue when suddenly I heard a loud, cloying voice belonging to none other than Juliette Lewis. She was standing outside of the Lucas hair salon talking on her cell phone, about business it seemed. She insisted that "that story has been told a thousand times" and she obviously was taking great pains to make sure she was heard by everyone else on the street. She has a poor complexion and an even poorer blonde dye job. I was more thrilled on Friday evening to witness Chuck Woolery in the parking structure of the Arclight theatre. He was kissing what appeared to be a young woman (I didn't see her close-up, she could have been one of those scary old-young LA types) and helping her into his Jaguar. He has frosted tips (!) and was dressed like some kind of Abercrombie reject.

· I was working for the National Testing Day at the Magic Johnson shopping center across the street from the Slauson Swap Meet yesterday and during my lunch break to my surprise I saw Eriq LaSalle from ER walking around. He went into some shop and got fitted for gold teeth. Is this guy just trying too hard to fit in or what?

· Saw Dennis Miller and his kid down the aisle from us at the matinee of "Land of the Dead" in Santa Barbara. Dennis, recently finding he has quite a bit of free time lately, looking very dressed down but unflappably polite as he stood up for my gorgeous blonde Valkyrie-lookin' girlfriend to pass by. His kid may have left early and Dennis split immediately on seeing end-credits roll - off to his wild blue yonders, no doubt. Didn't have the chance to tell him how great "The Off-White Album" was - alas, probably for another time.

· Santa Monica Koo Koo Roo Sunday 6/28 spotted Amber Valletta, Husband (?) and child. Child was running around while they ordered. She had no make up and was dressed down. Dad quizzed the kid on counting as the ate.

· Had a blast from the past Saturday 6/25. Saw Steve Guttenberg dining with two friends (a beautiful African-American model/actress type female, and an average joe type guy) at Boccalis, an Italian restaurant in Ojai. Guttenberg looks great and appeared to be enjoying his company. Seemed approachable but I was too busy wiping slobber off my two-year-olds face to fawn.

· 1. On Saturday the 25th, we had lunch at Farmer's Market/The Grove and spotted Tim Meadows chilling out walking a double stroller with his two kids. He looked quite comfortable and content. Nobody bothered him as he pushed the stroller along and enjoyed the good weather.
2. On saturday night (6/25) at the Tom Jones show (yes, I'm under 40 and loved the show) we saw Danny Bonaduce and wife in the front area. He had the occasional person walking up to him to shake his hand and he was quite friendly with all the greetings. Of course, you had the occasional drunk bozo who'd yell "Hey Danny, Get Happy!" then laugh at themselves.

· Saw Danny Bonaduce at 24 Hour Fitness by the Arclight today (6/28), looking short and buff. I also see Jason Priestley there often so I guess it is the place to be for men who feel the need to buff up if they aren't successful in the height department.