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The way we've been able to tolerate living in this increasingly neo-fundamentalist country is by viewing the Hudson as an impermeable membrane, comfortable that on our side, at least, lies that pleasant muck of atheism, decadence, and iniquity in which we all wallow. Then we heard Billy Graham was coming. But, on more reflection, we figured that's OK, too: We have characters of all sorts in this city, and if New Yorkers can tolerate Jocelyn Wildenstein and Al Goldstein and John Rocker and the Naked Cowboy, why not tolerate some evangelically religious dude for a few days? But now the Times tells us that there is actually a "varied, vibrant, and, by many accounts, growing population of evangelical Christians" living within the city. Which totally freaks us out.

If you need us tonight, we'll be at The Cock, blowing rails and having anonymous group sex, all in a desperate attempt to cleanse from ourselves this acrid scent of piety.

In New York, Bill Graham Will Find an Evangelical Force [NYT]