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To quote a reader who put it best, this morning's blind items were "perhaps the most elementary blind items" in the history of man. On the other hand, it's Friday and we'd all be pissy if we had to think about anything too hard. Grass is always greener, gang. Onward:

Which top leading man interviewed three different starlets for the job of girlfriend/future wife before picking his new beloved?
 You said: Duh, duh, Tom and Katie. Some of you expressed admiration at Page Six's ability to time this blind item with the announcement of their baffling engagement, and then there's this item, which suggests that Katie won the coveted Cruise beard only because Jessica Alba, Kate Bosworth, and Lindsay Lohan weren't having it. Props to the one reader who didn't guess TomKat (that's the one and only time we'll use that word, by the way) and went with Harrison Ford and Calista Flockhart. Which, of course, makes no sense at all.

After the jump, the rest of your non-libelous, innocent suggestions.

Which teen terror has herpes?
 You answered: Can any teen-oriented blind item not involve Lindsay Lohan? The shriveling actress was almost unanimously your guess, although there was Mischa Barton shout-out and, in what would be a remarkable feat of synergy, the suggestion that the herpetic lass is Katie Holmes. If so, at least we know Tom won't be getting infected. Other random guess: Tara Reid, "just because."

Which young wife of a big-name director is upset at her husband? He's hired a blonde actress twice now...
 You guessed: Soon-Yi might be headed for heartbreak, as a staggering number of you feel that Woody Allen is carrying a torch for Scarlett Johansson (um, who isn't?). Other guesses included James Cameron and flame for Lindsay Lohan...because, as we just said, all blind items must involve Lindsay Lohan.