Kill The Smokers. Kill Them Now!
We know that smoking is bad, OK? And that smokers are bad people? And that anyone who so much as says the word cigarette should be cast down by stones in the town square? That if you see a smoker on the street, you should stab them in the face? We're all agreed on this, right?
Because New York is after smokers again. We've kicked them out of the bars, we're kicking them off the streets and now we're not letting them order cigarettes to their homes. The state legislature is trying to make cigarettes "non-mailable," so that smokers can no longer order smokes off the Web. They've gotten the credit card companies not to take cigarette orders online (which is totally not true, by the way), and they've made FedEx promise not to process them either. Now they're trying to make the postal service stop delivering them. Because smokers are monsters. If we could just find them in their homes, we could drag them out and toss them in prison, where they belong. Freaks.—WL
