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Do you meet the following four qualifications?

1. Have three or four thousand dollars lying around.
2. Think Brown Bunny is brilliant.
3. Very much dislike Roger Ebert.
4. Enjoy having things on your wall that look like they have poo splattered all over them?

This should narrow it down to, oh, everybody! Sotheby's is auctioning off a Vincent Gallo "painting" that he "painted" in "June 1985." It's called One Memory, presumably a memory that involved much psilocybin. In its auction notes, Sotheby's warns that the "work is deliberately distressed, making proper condition analysis impossible." Which pretty sums up Vincent Gallo, when you think about it.—WL

One Memory [Sotheby's]