Thursday Brain Teaser:
Letter to McSweeney's, or Letter to Romenesko?

1) Forgive my language, but I am a whole new level of pissed off. I just finished reading the Free Press's piece, "Albom probe shows no pattern of deception." And I just learned — for the first time — a very, very key detail of the Albom saga that somehow eluded me until moments ago: Mitch's now-uber-famous April 3 column (which, interestingly, is nowhere to be found in the Free Press's archives) began with a St. Louis dateline. Excuse me?!

2) It is with great consternation that I write this letter. One Patrick Morris recently wrote, "Anyone that drinks no pulp is, sorry to say, a baby. What, you can't take little bits of orange? Well then you don't really like oranges. You're just a fake orange-juice drinker." I most respectfully say that Patrick Morris is a punk. If one wishes to eat little bits of orange, then one should go eat an orange. If one wishes to drink juice, then one must drink juice not chucks of pulp and orange.

3) I feel the British food recently reviewed by Ori Fienberg deserves a revisionist perspective. I have been British for 22 years, nearly long enough to earn a clock, but have never heard of 'mutton sog' or 'head cheese.'

4) Am I the only one disturbed by the placement of the Ellen DeGeneres ad in this week's Life?

Can you figure out which complaints, inside jokes, and bizarre rants are from hipsters, and which are from esteemed members of the journalistic community? Winners receive forwarded copies of Radar-related hate mail. -AP