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There's so much going on in this week's edition of New York that our heads simultaneously exploded and imploded — yes, it's totally possible. See for yourself:

· That Starbucks slave handing you your latte is secretly a guerilla of the labor revolution, and Corporate HQ is freaking out.
· Desperate for singleton relevancy, Amy Sohn turns to porn.
· It's time to pay attention to C. Virginia Fields, as she might be the only democrat to take down Bloomberg.
· Everyone's yachting but you, because you're sitting in a cubicle right now.
· How to cut and paste your way to an original item about the Sun.
· A Look Book sent from heaven above.
· Gawker is a teenage girl, which means we could probably sell some books.
· Next stop, Molestation Station.