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The issue of the National Enquirer that hits the stands today features pictures of Cameron Diaz allegedly making out with a man that is not boyfriend/finace/lifepartner/whatever Justin Timberlake. Here's the thing: The NE identifies the guy as Shane Nickerson, a producer on Diaz's better-world-through-bungee-jumping show Trippin'. And, conveniently for those of us with internet access, Nickerson has a blog where he defends himself and recounts how a reporter from the NE showed up at his front door to confront him with the story (make sure you read the whole post to get his side):

Here's the other thing: It's such a ludicrous story, that there was never a moment from her of "Is this true?" In fact, I told my wife, "One of the reasons this is so stupid is because you know that if I was hooking up with CD you'd have been the first one I high-fived." She laughed because she knows me. If The National Enquirer knew me at all, they'd have saved whatever money they paid for this supposed picture.

We haven't seen the magazine (if we had an extra five bucks, we'd eat lunch today), but an operative that's seen the pics and the issue describes them thusly: "He and Cameron are on the cover of NE with the headline CAMERON CAUGHT CHEATING, and pics of them hugging in some bushes. You can't see if they're sucking face, but it's a very very intimate hug if they weren't. The photographer who caught them says in the NE that they were making out, at one point 'kissing passionately for a good three minutes.... They just kept kissing, barely coming up for air.'"

This is the part where we cop to having no fucking clue as to what to believe (naturally, we lean toward the blogger over the "false tabloid"). If Nickerson is indeed the guy in the photographs (he doesn't deny it's him), we can't know if he's hunting for tonsils, sharing a hug with a pal, or sucking out some poison from a lip-wound suffered when Diaz tried her hand at snakecharming to make a point about deforestation. If pressed to make a philospohical point about the whole affair, we'd ask with a shrug and a sigh, "When it comes down to it, aren't we all trippin' in our own way?"

Only one thing seems certain: Nothing good can ever come of Cameron Diaz leaving the house.