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Those Fox employees who failed to be impressed by their overlords' recent gifts of free corn-dogs and fake-tit-cakes may finally have an opportunity to rejoice: In its latest fit of largesse (and with News Corp profits down 8 percent), the Studio Store is waking its silent auction from a four-year slumber, offering clothes previously worn by stars in the Fox stable at bargain prices. From an e-mail announcing the sale:

*Ladies Christian Dior shoes in size 10 and worn by Paris Hilton in THE SIMPLE LIFE 3. Retail value $495, opening bid $150.
*Ladies tailored Armani jacket in size 8 worn by Jessica Walter in ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT. Retail value unknown, opening bid $75.
*Men's "paper, denim & cloth" jeans in size 31 worn by Ryan Seacrest at the Billboard Music Awards. Approximate retail value $140, opening bid $45.
*Men's long sleeved tee by Mikosa and purchased for Ryan Seacrest's appearance at the Billboard Music Awards. Retail value $75, opening bid $40.

That's right, for (potentially) less than the cost of a promotional-flavored lunch for four fellow underlings at the News Cafe, you can get into Ryan Seacrest's pants. Of course, a sharp blow to the back of Seacrest's head as he browses the DVD musicals section of the Studio Store might accomplish the same thing, but you'd probably like to keep your job to take advantage of future perks.

We hope that News Corp raises enough money from the auction to avoid a plastic utensil-rationing debacle like our pals at Sony. No one wants to see that trend spread from Culver City to Century City.