Bennifer II: The Impregnating
Call off the Jennifer Garner WombWatch! While we were rolling on Saturday and hugging tourists on the Third Street Promenade, one kind stranger escaped our chemically-induced love-clinch and asked if we were so happy because Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner announced that they've created another human life deep underneath her Alias-toned abs. So now that we're finally hugged out and back in front of the internets: Huzzah! We're especially elated that the couple's canny PR team observed the Order of Operations for a celebrity knocking-up: engagement first, fertilized eggs second.
As an early baby-shower gift, a top Defamer operative sent in this BenGar sighting from Saturday. It seems that the pregnancy news had not yet hit the wires, for the paparazzi let the happy couple escape; if they'd known about the baby, someone would've tackled Garner so that pictures of her midsection could be snapped for sale to US Weekly.
sat very close to jen garner and ben affleck at cafe montana on saturday afternoon. they came around the corner looking very incognito in hoodies, but ended up sitting right near the front door of the restaurant. they seemed to be served much faster than anyone else, which was a little annoying, and there were paparazzi taking photos through the trees outside.
i really couldn't see what they were eating. she seemed to be munching on a sandwich without the bun. in the middle of their meal, a woman who seemed to be an acquaintance of theirs came up to the table and screamed "i haven't seen you in a while, congratulations!" very loudly in the middle of the restaurant. they seemed a little uncomfortable with that. in fact, they seemed to be a little uncomfortable with being out in public in general. they were whispering throughout their entire meal. ben put an unlit cigarette in his mouth before they even got up from the table which kind of grossed me out. she looks very young in person and has perfect skin. if you didn't know who they were, you wouldn't look at them twice, but she is very pretty. when they left, paparazzi were following them down the block. i saw them speed away a few minutes later in ben's gray range rover.