David Geffen Gives Back The Beach
A mere twenty-two years after David Geffen promised to allow access to the public beach blocked by his enormous Gay Mafia Xanadu, the entertainment mogul finally turned over keys to the gate that will allow the Malibu common folk to frolic in the sand. To Geffen's credit, once he finally exhausted all possible legal delays and was forced to hand over the keys, he did his best to ensure that his Passage to the Pacific is as warm and welcoming as possible for the coastal interlopers:
[Access for All co-founder Steve] Hoye said he picked up the keys Wednesday from a Geffen aide after producing an insurance policy as proof of the group's liability coverage. He briefly opened the gate on Thursday and discovered that Geffen had paved the once-sand walkway, enclosed it between walls and installed a second set of gates about 25 feet seaward of the white wooden gates along Pacific Coast Highway.
Unreported in the LAT story are details of the murals Geffen commissioned for the walls that helpfully guide beach-goers to the frothy, exclusive surf, which feature ten-foot portraits of the Malibu feudal lord frowning with disapproval and bear neighborly slogans like, "I don't swim in the coffee can in your shack, so please don't pee in my ocean."
