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We break from today's onslaught of studio-related news to bring you this quick-hitting fashion critique of one of Hollywood's hackiest directors, who was unlucky enough to gas up next to a reader who's got an eye for style:

Santa Monica, 4/6: Saw none other than than the Bad Boy himself, Michael Bay, gassing up his silver Ferarri Maranello next to me at the Chevron on Lincoln Blvd. at Olympic. Talking on the cellphone, tall, thin, stylin'....until he comes around the near side of the car, and I see that he's wearing stone-washed jeans and white Nikes. Bro, you missed the Footloose audition by 23 years.

Mr. Bay, the wardrobe department from Miami Vice is calling, and they're quite cross that you've been raiding their "background tourist" rack. They're going to need that stuff back for the movie version, don't get too attached.

This has been the Fauxteur Fashion Minute. Next time: Brett Ratner wears clothes, is excoriated for it.

Related: The appropriately out-of-date FAQ from Michael Bay's official website.