Short Ends: WWPHC? (What Would Paris Hilton Charge?)
· What's Paris Hilton's time potentially worth? $250,000 an hour, but this is according to a crazy pimp in Bellevue and it's only if she's on her back or assuming the doggystyle position. Fascinating. Who knew she could be such an earner?
· HBO enables a third season of Old West fuckin' and cocksuckerin' by picking up more Deadwood.
· Super Mario delivered a petition to honorary Hollywood mayor Johnny Grant to include video game characters on the Walk of Fame. After he handed over the petition, he joined the other people in cheap movie costumes in front of the Chinese Theater for a lively session of hitting the crackpipe.
· Reason number 24 why you should love that Burger King commercial with Hootie: "The Twin Black Cowboys. They are obviously exhausted from banging all the chicks at The Tender Crisp Bacon Cheddar Ranch, so now they just want to lay down and have a snack."