This weekend, Times film critics Manohla Dargis and A.O. Scott hate everyone and everything:

'THE BALLAD OF JACK AND ROSE' Review by Manohla Dargis
Rebecca Miller's attempt to elevate a small Oedipal story about two damaged souls into a grandiloquent epic misses by a significantly wide mark.

'GUESS WHO' Review by A.O. Scott
This loose, pointless remake of "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner" at least suggests that American racial attitudes have relaxed since 1967.

'MISS CONGENIALITY 2: ARMED AND FABULOUS' Review by Manohla Dargis
It isn't just that this junky sequel is nearly absent a single genuine laugh; it's that instead of a screenplay and a story we now have stereotypes and sketch comedy.

'OLDBOY' Review By Manohla Dargis
The most interesting thing about "Oldboy" is that like so much "product" now coming out of Hollywood, it is a B movie tricked out as an A movie.

Ah, like hit jobs tricked out as reviews. The irony is adorable, really.