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Gawker exclusive: Hilary Duff has defiled the ironically disastrous alcoves normally reserved for downtown New York's finest assymetrical haircuts! In what can only be described as a painful fit of post-punk partying, Miss Liquid Ice spent Friday night asserting her hipster cred and spacing out to Joy Division at East Village inferno Lit. This only prepared her for Saturday night, where she graced the weekly Misshapes party with her DJ skills. (She played a lot of Smiths, we hear, and we bet she made friends with Queen Leigh Lezark. But did she use the bathrooms? That's the real question.) So, um, what the fuck? How could bubbly clean Duff invade these smoke-filled, drug-oozing dens of indie sin? And, more importantly, what will Disney think?

On that note, all of you art students should probably head to Queens. Lizzie McGuire just killed your identity.
UPDATE: Our informants tell us that it's worse than we thought: last night, the Duffster hit the Motherfucker brouhaha to catch Bloc Party before making her way over to Morrissey night at Sway. And then, she got a lifetime subscription to Spin and ate six pairs of legwarmers.