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· Spoler Alert! "[Michael Jackson's penis] looks like a barber's pole. The first kid and all the other kids who have seen his penis know that there are brown circles around it." Now that we've got that out there, we can all come forward and testify. [Page Six]
· Meanwhile, did Jackson himself leak (heh) grand jury testimony to the The Smoking Gun? [R&M]
· Is US Weekly becoming the new Star? Both Britney Spears and Brad Pitt are publicly expressing their discontent with the Min-ions'© unrestrained coverage as of late. [E!]
· First the boys behind Proenza Schouler break up, and now Domenico Dolce and Stefano Gabbana are ending their romance. At this rate, Mark Badgley and James Mischka are going to be drinking Bud Light in no time. [Page Six]
· Grammy-winning rapper Kanye West seems to think he should be paid to be on magazine covers; magazine editors everywhere have a good laugh. [Lowdown]