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We hear there's some big sporting event next weekend, in which all alpha-males will sit around with domestic beers and stare, for hours on end, at other sweaty alpha-males wearing tight pants. They call this strange phenomenon the Bowl of Super, and it is very, very heterosexual. While we love us some sweaty beefcakes, we tend to lack the attention span for this strange ritual and prefer to focus on the commercials, which are usually entertaining in their crude lameness. Unfortunately, the one Superbowl commercial that might have made us genuinely smile, in which Janet Jackson's wardrobe malfunction is explained through the magic of Bud Light, will not air during the Fox broadcast. Why not? Because, despite the fact that the ad is painfully tame, the boys at Bud Light are frozen with the fear of indecency fines. Awesome, right? It's like Michael Powell is smiling down on us all from resignation heaven.

Banned Bud Light Commercial [CollegeHumor]
Malfunction 'Explainer' Ad Won't Air [USA Today]