Dear Tina,

Thank you for not accompanying Diane Sawyer on the media parade to Phuket or sending Harold to shadow Colin Powell in Sri Lanka. During challenging times such as these, when we find ourselves reevaluating life and cable news, it is comforting to know some things don't change with the tides.

Sincerely yours,
Henry the Intern

After the jump, Henry the Intern takes on a new year full of the same old Tina.

With the first "Topic A" of 2005, Tina dedicated time to the forgotten war in Iraq. Indeed, insurgents now outnumber American troops. She questioned Jon Lee Anderson, author of The Fall of Baghdad, who is based there for The New Yorker. Anderson agreed with Tina's characterization of the country as one of "chronic emergency." He said, "It's particularly noticeable for Westerners here who have to live in fortified islands." As for the upcoming election, "most of us are expecting a bloodbath or something close to it," but for him, "it's still the most important story on earth."

Tina then welcomed Ethan Hawke and called Assault on Precinct 13 "one of the most compelling cop movies I've seen since 'The French Connection.'" Hawke found the role "dynamic": "you don't normally get to play an action hero who has lost his confidence." Separately, he said of the decade gap between Before Sunrise and Before Sunset: "I know that I'm a very different person, but I'm not so different."

Next, feminist documentarian Jennifer Baumgardner, who created the controversial "I had an abortion" t-shirt and is producing a film on the theme, revealed that younger women are "more ambivalent" about abortion because "they've always had the right" and can "deal with their own agency." Replied Tina, "Ambivalency is a luxury."

Tina asked Baumgardner, a bisexual, "What do you get out of sex with a women?" Answer: "There is a lot to learn," including "how to have a relationship with equality." Concluded Tina, "So sex is political?" Definitely, confirmed Baumgardner.

Finally, the editor's desk roundtable —editors? what editors?— analyzed the week of Amber Frey and Andrea Yates. "Poor Amber," said Tina. Attorney Ed Hayes was "not unsympathetic to her" and comedienne Jessi Klein thought, "She's hot, but not kill-your-wife hot." Speaking of, Tina was positive Amber had "developed a new cup size." But the most pressing question for Tina and attorney Wendy Murphy was how Scott performed in bed. "Not even Oprah asked," said Tina.

The panel then discussed the new book French Women Don't Get Fat. Apparently French women eat slowly, explained Tina, "rather than pigging out on the run as I do." Added Klein, "What she does not address is that I have slowly eaten and savored many a Ring-Ding."

Hot picks
Brad Gooch, writer: Berlin, "It has edge."
Murphy: KourtsForKids.org
Klein: The Best of Triumph The Insult Comic Dog.
 Hayes: The Blind Man of Seville by Robert Wilson
Tina: The New Republic cover story about Dr. Phil

Tina read an email from a viewer who thinks the show is a "creative, orgasmic oasis of intelligence." Her reply, "Where were you when I was single?"

Tina briefly observed "the male answer to 'Sex and the City'" is here in two new cable offerings: The Military Channel and The Military History Channel. (Not to mention LOGO for those "don't ask don't tellers.")

Closing quote by Susan Sontag: "I envy paranoids; they actually feel people are paying attention to them."