We just got a wonderful press release that announces Dennis Publishing, the company behind Maxim and Stuff (the magazines for men who love women—but hate them, too), Blender (for music lovers who can accept Jessica Simpson being called a "musician"), and The Week (for people who want the world—in 250-words or less) will be launching a series of products with branding/licensing firm TippingSprung in 2005:

Barry Pincus, director of brand development at Dennis, said, Maxim is the world s best-selling men s lifestyle magazine. We look forward to continuing our efforts in bringing additional high quality lifestyle products to our audience which compliment the existing products launched over the last two years.

TippingSprung, as part of the exclusive representation agreement with Dennis, plans to pursue licenses in multiple product categories, including vitamins, beverages, frozen food, sporting goods, and automotive products.

Awesome! So, can we expect to see Stuff Turkey and Stuffing TV Dinners? Maybe Blender One-a-Day multivitamins? Maxim malt liquor? The Week car air freshener?

The mind literally reels. For about three minutes. Then it goes blank.