· Oh, who is newly-brunette Paris fucking now? "Based upon appearance alone, the only thing that I could come up with is that Stephen Dorff stumbled upon a forgotten stash of ephedrine, put his head in a vice, got himself a New Wave 80s haircut, broke into Kevin Federline's closet and stole his wardrobe." Well, then it must be skateboarder Chad Muska. [Whatevs]
· Wenner Media needs our help! When the editors can't decide between Rolling Stone covers featuring Bill Murray, Keanu Reeves, Sean Penn, or Leonardo DiCaprio, they turn to a company survey. And we take that survey and give it to you, dear readers. [RS Employee Survey]
· Just in case you can't get enough of your rancid neighbors' rants about every little thing, try setting up an internet message board for your building. [NYT]
· Part-time Gawky slave Andrew Krucoff reflects on his Conde obsession over the past year. [Krucoff]
· And, lest you think Paris used up her internet quota for the day, allow us to point out her autographed stapler. [cMarket]